An open letter to the midriff.

 

I see you there, sneaking into catwalks, Vogue and hell even celebrity red carpet events. And really I don't think its appropriate, necessary or fair.

  

While you swan in there, carb-free diets, pilate-d up with the tan you picked up from your latest sojourn in the Caribbean, you get all us normal midriffs excited. We think its time to play, time to bare all and be free. But the truth is that our snowy white (positively reflective) slightly rounded and most certainly not toned midriffs have no place out of our shirts, dresses or rad high-wasted pants.

  

Stop taunting us, because as gorgeous and casually cool as you look, you are in the minority, and an army of pasty potbellies will come out. And you don't want that. Nobody wants that.

  

So, slowly button up, pull down those tee shirts (or buy a bigger size) and remain only out on the beaches - and only if you must.

  

That is all.